2016: Candidates To Consider

Like an election we have here in the good old US of A there will always be fringe candidates……we will always have the two dominate parties but there is always those hanging around the fringe trying desperately to get their message out for all to hear…..

In my day our “gimmick” candidates were Pat Paulson or Alfred E. Newman or even Mickey Mouse…..but we have come a long way since those Dark Ages…………..

2016 will be No different……there will be a Green Party candidate, a Socialist candidate, the Constitution Party, and even a Whig…..but there are others that are too far out there to garner much attention by the MSM…….I thought I would be a good guy and give some of them their props……

There are as of this moment 366 people seeking the office of President of the United States of America next year, and as much as we apparently love the idea of He Who Shall Not Be Named 2016, some of the actual humans who’ve declared their candidacy sound just as fictional. The New York Times runs through some of the more colorful characters, many of whom seem quite taken with capital letters, who would like to get their hands on the nuclear codes:

  • President Princess Khadijah M. Jacob-Fambro, Revolutionary Party: Instead of listing a presidential campaign committee, she made a marriage proposal to a celeb: “FROM ONE ALIEN TO ANOTHER ALIEN … ‘LIL WAYNE’ ‘DWAYNE MICHAEL CARTER Jr.’ ‘PRESIDENT CARTER’ WILL YOU MARRY ME? I AM GOD!!! (smiley emoticon) President Princess Khadijah M. Jacob-Fambro”

HRM Caesar Saint Augustine de Buonaparte Emperor of the United States of Turtle Island, Absolute Dictator Party: We’ll just call him Caesar. The Times notes that this is his sixth run for the Oval; he rails against “FREAKS RUNNING THE PLANET” in his filing. Here’s his YouTube channel, but his FEC filing is, er, thorough.

  • John Green Ferguson, National Eco/Green Party & The Revolutionary ‘Third Party’ Movement: Ferguson appears to have caps lock on lockdown, and looks forward to “BEING ELECTED YOUR NEXT NEW 45TH USA PRESIDENT IN 2016 !!!” He offers his views and hawks things here.

  • Kevin Deame, Pirate Party: Presumably unpopular among the pixie-dust set, the Connecticut man filed in April.

The bar for filing FEC paperwork is pretty low, a rep tells the Times: “The only requirement to file that form is if they raise or spend more than $5,000. Anyone can file that FEC form.” For more, including Vermin Supreme, check out the Times’ full piece

Found your candidate yet?

Stay tuned….it will get crazier, no doubt!

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