Once again the weekend begins….it comes around once a week (or so)…..Biden made a speech….Zelensky tries his hand at bullying….GOP offers a killer budget….and a partridge in a pear tree.

To open with….there are many ways of predicting the future….tea leaves, bumps in you head, etc….do you know what tyromancy is?

How accurately can that provolone in your fridge predict the future? How good of a soothsayer is that wheel of Stilton? You may not have the answers to those questions, but Jennifer Billock thinks she does. That’s because the Chicago native is a self-proclaimed expert in tyromancy, described by Occultopedia as the centuries-old “art and practice of divining the past, the present, and the future by interpreting omens found in cheese.” “Every piece of cheese has something it can tell you about the cheese itself, and also about you,” the 40-year-old dairy diviner tells Reuters. Billock tells FOX 32 Chicago that she first learned about this unique form of prognostication at the start of the pandemic, “when I was Googling ‘weird ways to tell the future.'”

Billock explains that she can’t use just any old type of cheese to ply her craft, noting, “You want something that has holes or veins or ash or even … a moldy piece” to best deliver a prophesy. Flat Gruyere, for instance, wouldn’t be a great medium. The ideal choices? Blue cheese and Swiss, according to Billock. She says she prefers clients bring their own cheese to her readings, because it’s a cheese they may already “feel a connection to,” but if that’s not possible, Billock is more than happy to tap into her own stash. No one’s a bigger fan of her particular way of fortune-telling than Billock herself. “I really enjoy it, I love cheese,” she tells Reuters. “It’s great, because you get your fortune told and then you get to eat it!” She does tell FOX 32 that she doesn’t get many follow-up calls, however, so she’s not sure how accurate her predictions are.

Does wine come with the cheese?

Let’s stick with the food thingy….how many of us have a bowl of cereal in the mornings?

Eat fast!

Sales trends in breakfast foods suggest that Tony the Tiger and Toucan Sam may be looking for new work in the future. The Wall Street Journal reports that the top players in the cereal industry—Kellogg, Post Holdings, and General Mills—have seen declining sales in recent years, and expect the trend to continue. Other than a significant (5.2%) sales bump in 2020, when more people ate breakfast at home during the pandemic, sales have been on a downward trajectory, falling 8.7% in 2021 and another 3.9% in 2022.

The Journal notes that while people “gorged” on cereal in the ’80s and ’90s due to nutritionists favoring carbs over high-protein, high-cholesterol foods like eggs, experts now warn that the high sugar content found in breakfast cereals may not be the best way to start your day. Barclays analyst Andrew Lazar tells the Journal that more shoppers are picking up frozen food options like breakfast burritos or opting for on-the-go choices such as breakfast shakes or bars. Fewer Americans are eating breakfast, according to a recent poll, Paste Magazine reports, which also contributes to less sales. They note that rebranding cereal as a dessert or snack is another way to restore the appeal of sugary products that perhaps have no business on the breakfast table, like Cookie Crisp.

Now for some news for severely handicapped….

A few months after receiving FDA approval to launch human trials, Neuralink is looking for people willing to let an experimental robot stick an equally experimental device into their brain. Elon Musk’s brain-implant startup is seeking people over the age of 22 with quadriplegia due to vertical spinal cord injury or ALS who have a “consistent and reliable caregiver” to join a six-year trial dubbed “the PRIME Study.” It’s an acronym that “makes no sense” as it “apparently stands for Precise Robotically Implanted Brain-Computer Interface,” the Verge reports. “The initial goal of our [brain-computer interface] is to grant people the ability to control a computer cursor or keyboard using their thoughts alone,” aiding communication, Neuralink said in a Tuesday blog post, per CNBC.

The study will test the brain implant device, the robot that surgically implants the device, and a user app whose software turns brain signals into computer actions. Though Neuralink’s implants have only been tested in animals, similar devices have already been inserted into human brains and been shown to help ALS patients communicate through a computer. A video published last month also shows researchers translating brain signals from a paralyzed stroke survivor into text, speech, and facial expressions. Neuralink’s “cosmetically invisible” wireless device will be implanted into “a region of the brain that controls movement intention” and “is intended to record and transmit brain signals wirelessly to an app that decodes movement intention,” the company said.

If successful it could be a boon for the handicapped to live a more productive life.

We are entering a danger zone here on Earth….

It’s not only that we have crossed the line with these boundaries, but that we are doing nothing to reverse most of the damage already caused. In fact, we continue to step further and further from the dividing line, increasing transgression levels and risking the future of humanity.

The scientists did point out that the limit for ozone depletion has reduced slightly, but it is still crossing the line. As for water, it went from barely safe to full-blown unsafe, notes Metro. This is reportedly due to river run-off and improvements in technology leading to a better understanding of the severity of the issue.

The co-author of the study, Johan Rockstrom, said Earth is ‘losing resilience’ and described our planet as a patient that is ‘sick’. Rockstrom, who is the director of the Potsdam Institute for Climate Impact Research in Germany, developed these nine markers of Earth’s health and stability back in 2009.

https://www.ohmymag.co.uk/news/humanity-heading-for-self-destruction-as-new-study-reveals-earth-is-in-very-bad-shape_art19134.html

Finally, I know you have heard of people that have a crappy day….well I’ll bet not this crappy!

A woman was rescued Tuesday from an outhouse toilet in northern Michigan after she climbed in to retrieve her Apple Watch and became trapped. The woman, whose name was not released, lowered herself inside the toilet after dropping the watch at the Department of Natural Resources boat launch at Dixon Lake in Otsego County’s Bagley Township, state police said Wednesday. First responders were called when the woman was heard yelling for help, the AP reports. The toilet was removed, and a strap was used to haul the woman out.

“If you lose an item in an outhouse toilet, do not attempt to venture inside the containment area. Serious injury may occur,” state police said in a release. The state police did not say Wednesday if the woman was injured or if the watch was recovered. Bagley Township is about 240 miles northwest of Detroit.

I think I would have mourned my loss and moved on.

Now the feel good story of the week and the reason I am a dog person….

The case of a missing toddler in Michigan had a happy ending earlier this week, but it was how she was found that bolstered, once again, dogs’ status as man’s best friend. Michigan State Police showed up at the home of a 2-year-old girl in Menominee County’s Faithorn area around 8pm local time on Wednesday, after it had been reported that she’d wandered off with the two family dogs, per WLUC. A massive search was soon underway in the rural region, complete with drones, police dogs, volunteers, and law enforcement officers, with helpers even arriving from neighboring Wisconsin to assist.

Around midnight, a collective sigh of relief: A local riding an ATV found the sleeping girl in a wooded area about 3 miles from her home—her two pups not only by her side, but also apparently serving as her protectors. “She laid down and used one of the dogs as a pillow, and the other dog laid right next to her and kept her safe,” Lt. Mark Giannunzio said Thursday, per the AP, calling it a “really remarkable story.” The toddler was examined by medical professionals and was said to be in good condition

Another reason they are called ‘man’s best friend’.

That is my ‘dump’ (no pun intended) for this Saturday…..go out and enjoy the first day of Autumn….

As always….be well and be safe….

I Read, I Write, You Know

“lego ergo scribo”